Hi Jim,
Rotate the shift shaft in the lower unit until find the gear selection points,three clicks close together,middle is neutral, R- N- F.Put control in neutral and put back together,you will need a helper to turn the flywheel to align the drive shaft.It doesn't matter what gear it is in as long as lower unit and control are in same gear.
There should be a plastic tube to help line up the water tube,it's probably on the tube.
The cam is for the reverse lock,when the motor is put in neutral or reverse the lock rod is pushed up and the hooks lock on the tilt pin.Not needed if you have power tilt.Assuming it's the black one you are talking about.The other one is shift shaft and reverse lock rod guide,you can see the rod sticking out.