Second question first.....either the pistons are stuck or an internal valve is stuck.
First question.....as I said in my previous post...but maybe not in this detail.
Raise the engine as high as you can....then support it somehow ( a rope to a tree limb, a cherry picker, or even a step ladder. Just leave yourself access to the unit. Since you can not get it to the locking tabs, you have to be creative.
-Remove the c clip on the upper pin (#22
http://www.boats.net/parts/search/Honda/Outboard%20Engine/1997/BF90AT%20LRTA%20/POWER%20TRIM-TILT/parts.html)
-Drive the pin #11 out.
-Then swing the whole top of the unit out. Just make sure you do not damage the wires going to the trim motor. You may have to lower the tilt to clear the engine. Then extend the tilt out again to its maximum length. Loosen the cap and you should be able to pull it out. Have a drip pan or an oil drain pan under it to catch any fluid that runs out. If you can not pull it out when the cap is totally loose, hit the up button on the trim a little at a time and it should push it right out.
-Change the seals or whatever you are going to do to the rod.
-When you go to put it back in, fill up the cylinder with fluid as far as you can while still allowing for room for the piston to be reinstalled. This will make bleeding much easier later on.
-Just to everything in reverse order to get it back together.
Maybe someone else has an easier way.
Mike